Getting through my anxieties

Therapy was good today. We talked about relaxation techniques for my anxiety. She worried about my anxiety turning into the start of OCD. Which, yes, I know I have a tendency to sometimes though I do catch myself. For the most part. I was able to get to my therapy early so I was sitting in my car for a bit. I kept hearing things around my car, there wasn’t anyone around but I kept hearing things. I was fearing that something or someone was by my car, so I got out and went inside the building to feel safer. […]

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Why did you stop wearing makeup?

I stopped wearing the little makeup I was already wearing years ago. About ten years ago. I didn’t want to stop wearing it. Although I’m not that great at applying it, I love makeup. I love all things beauty. Especially skin care since my skin is as dry as the Sahara Desert. I try not to be shy about my interests, but that is the way it is. I didn’t stop wearing makeup because I was shy. I was asked kind of recently on why I stopped wearing makeup. As in I just wash my face, moisturize and slap on […]

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Managing nightmares

I have been out of my anti-nightmare medication for over two weeks now. I need to wait till I see my psychiatrist tomorrow to get more. Since I’m still in the process of seeing what works for me and my doctor wasn’t the original person who prescribed the medication, I couldn’t have it refilled. I don’t remember what the medication is called. I suppose I can simply head to the bedroom to look, but that requires me to move. At the moment I’m not feeling very energetic. Anywho, this medication keeps me from having nightmares. My PTSD has been in […]

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Dissociating..

Sometime I’d like to post those humorous type posts where I can be sarcastic and funny. Maybe later when I’m not so exhausted. I’m emotionally exhausted. Having to be around so many people this last weekend and week takes a lot out of me. I’m not sure completely why, though last weekend was a bit stressful. I dissociated a few times. It gets frustrating when I find that I have dissociated because I’m trying to be more aware of it before it happens. To recognize the symptoms and feelings so I can do my grounding techniques to keep my mind […]

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Down memory lane…

I have a hard time remembering things. This is a bit different and it’s frustrating. I can remember many things from years ago. My short-term memory seems to have gotten worse. What’s crazy is that I used to have a photographic memory. I was able to picture things in my head. Now? Not so much. I can see hazy things, colors, sometimes it would just be black. I know what something would look like, say my car or one of my cats. Though I can’t picture them in my head. When someone says to imagine a beach, there is nothing […]

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On the road to organization.. again

I would think that with the amount of stuff going through my head every day that writing it all down should be easy. For some reason, what it’s in my head does not translate on paper very well. I am meaning to write more on paper also. Mostly because I’m to log my Ptsd and Cyclothymic symptoms and try to separate the symptoms and triggers. It is a bit overwhelming, but I’m trying to come up with a better-organized system for next year. I almost always try new ways to get me to do things, remember things, not become overwhelmed […]

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