Mushy brain

My brain is mush. After some hours of reading and then taking practice test number 4, I actually got an 84%. There is just so much information to memorize. Memorization has always been a struggle for me. I don’t mean short-term memorization. I can do that. It’s long-term memorization. What I read yesterday, I find that I may have retained 10 or 20 percent of that. In elementary school, they tried to come up with some reason to why I couldn’t remember what I read a week ago. Part of me thinks it’s because I wasn’t interested in what I was reading, to begin with. I used to make notes in a notebook. Doodles and pictures and words. They did help. I needed something visual to look at to help me remember what I’m supposed to remember.

Can others even picture images in their head? Imagine a fountain. No. I can’t. My brain is blank. It’s trying to imagine something and it can’t do it. I know exactly what a fountain looks like. If I see one, then I know what it is. I remember a fountain I saw at Costco a month ago. It was like a ball and water running down it. I remember the color. I don’t remember what the fountain exactly looks like, just that it had a ball. My past in my head is filled with sounds, colors and what I felt at that time of the memory. Whether it’s good or bad or whatever. I can’t picture people in my head. When I dream, I know who the person is but can’t see their face. Maybe everyone is like this?

..So, as I read more and study more, I have pretty much forgotten much of what I read in the beginning. I have made multiple notebooks though found I don’t always know exactly what I’m reading about in the notes. Do I need better note-taking? Maybe. What I need are shorter notes in clear cut, to-the-point, this-is-what-the-heck-I’m-reading-about notes. I think those are called flash cards. Which is what I have been doing for the past week or so. In conjunction with reading and taking practice tests. Therefore my brain is mushy.

My brain does not feel well right now. I need to organize it. Though, how? It’s not like organizing my sock drawer. Yes, I have organized my sock drawer.