Albuquerque is having a nice thunderstorm at the moment. Being that it’s always hotter down here then it is in my small town, it is really nice. It’s 70 degrees and I’m having some hot tea. Mostly the hot tea is for my stomach. I’m not sure if I have come down with something or I caught what Kel has had for the past week. The ibprophen has helped my headache a bit. I’m at Starbucks at the moment, trying to study as I watch the rain outside. I love the rain. It’s so calming. I just noticed that Starbucks isn’t playing any music. Hmmm…it could be that I can’t hear it above everyone talking. Even though I have my hearing aids on. There are so many people here. Anxiety-inducing. I’m trying not to dissociate. Drinking a hot drink, pinching the skin between my thumb and index finger, trying to keep grounded. I’m sweating. I hate anxiety sweat. I’m ok here, I’m safe, no need to feel paranoid. Everyone is just here to get coffee. Everyone is minding their own business. I look around and see all these people. Do they feel claustrophobic? Do they feel anxiety? Maybe some.
I have this new refurbished laptop. I love it so much. Mostly for the fact that it weighs much less than my old laptop. (Ok, does anyone know the keyboard shortcut for “underline” in Linux? I had to go in and type the HTML code for underline.) Since I’m still in the text mode… I’m blue da ba dee da ba daa
Anywho, back to the laptop… my old laptop was intended to be a desktop replacement, not to be lugged around. I only bought it because I had to at the time. I didn’t need it. Nor did I want it since I always had a desktop. Yet, my ex somehow needed me to sit next to him while he played his video games and while I did my homework. I’m still not sure how I had gotten through school.
This post will be continued later… Tom just showed up and my laptop needs some updates done. I’m not confident enough to update a Linux machine yet. Soon, I will be! lol