I have therapy today, and I keep reminding myself of that because I keep forgetting. Even writing this right now is a challenge for my focus. I just took a moment to clean up my email inbox, but now that I’m back, I can concentrate on writing.
Kel had to rush off to work for something, although I’m not entirely sure what it was since she left the house so quickly that she forgot her glasses. She drove without them! The frustrating part is that she isn’t being compensated for this work, which seems unfair. She texted me saying she would be back soon.
I reached out to Lexi to ask if she had run out of her medication because I’ve noticed a change in her behavior. She confirmed that she has. I can only imagine how difficult the withdrawal symptoms must be for her. That could explain why she’s been feeling so unwell lately. I’m relieved she has doctor appointments coming up, and I’ve advised her to let me know when her supply is running low. I just wish she would take this advice more seriously.
In therapy, we discussed the concept of dissociative amnesia, which felt oddly familiar yet difficult to fully comprehend. This type of memory loss isn’t brought on by injury or illness; rather, it occurs as the mind attempts to protect itself. It’s often associated with trauma, wherein the brain essentially decides, “This is too overwhelming,” and stores away certain memories.
I’ve never had a strong memory and often struggle to recall much from my childhood, whether it’s the pleasant moments or the unpleasant ones. Even now, in non-traumatic situations, I find it challenging to remember things. I rely on photographs to help jog my memory, yet there are still instances when I can’t recall the context, such as where I was or the moment the picture was taken.
I’m feeling a bit confused when I talk about therapy. So much of what the therapist discusses seems to slip away from me. It’s as if my brain processes it only to forget almost immediately, leaving me with a blur of thoughts about what was shared.
It’s quite frustrating for me because it seems I require several therapy sessions discussing the same topic before I can truly begin processing and retaining what has been said.
The house is dim, and the rain outside has been steady for several hours now. The nice aspect is that it’s not too hot outside at the moment. I just switched on the lights in the house, and the idea of making myself a warm cup of tea sounds quite appealing right now.
