In 2027, we’re heading to Japan’s capital city. We’ll be boarding our cruise ship there, and I’m assuming we’ll arrive a few days early, just to be safe. Nothing sounds worse than rushing through airports and time zones only to risk missing the ship, so a little buffer time feels like the smart move. Plus, that means a couple of extra days to explore Tokyo, which is definitely not a bad thing.
I’m excited for this trip. There’s something magical about planning to visit a place you’ve only ever seen in photos or videos. At the same time, I’m a little nervous, just normal travel jitters. I’ve never been to Japan before, so everything will be brand-new to me.
The only “Japan story” I have is actually one I don’t remember at all. When we moved from the Philippines to the States, the Navy accidentally sent all our belongings to Japan instead of San Diego. I was only a year old, so I don’t have any memory of it, just the way my dad used to tell the story when I was growing up. It always felt like one of those funny family anecdotes you hear your whole life, and now, all these years later, I’ll finally get to see Japan for myself.
Japan is about sixteen hours ahead of us, and I keep wondering how that time difference will actually feel. Will I get serious jet lag this time? When I went to London, I barely felt it on the way there, though it definitely hit me when I came back home. I’m curious how my body will handle crossing all those time zones to Japan.
Alexis will be coming with us on this trip. Karissa joined us when we went to Alaska, and next year, both girls will be coming along on our cruise. I love that we’re getting to share these trips with them.
Thinking about all this reminds me that I still need to finish my travel journals. I have notes and little mementos from Alaska, London, and our last cruise just waiting to be pasted in. One of these weekends, when we’re just relaxing at home, I really need to sit down and catch up. It would help if I could find my glue stick and scissors. Ever since my desk broke, everything has been piled up, and nothing is where it should be. Hopefully, I can get it all sorted soon so I can dive back into journaling.
Oh, shoot! I totally forgot I have therapy at 3! I even reminded myself this morning, and it’s on my calendar and on my watch, yet somehow it still slipped my mind. I keep doing that lately. At least I remembered with enough time to get myself settled beforehand.
I’m not really sure what I’m going to talk about today. I’m doing okay, just a little overwhelmed. I’m trying to study, but it feels like there’s this huge list of things I need to get done and not nearly enough time to do them. The strange part is that, logically, I know I don’t actually have that much on my plate. At least… I don’t think I do. It’s more like my brain is convinced I’m behind, even when the reality doesn’t match that feeling. It’s frustrating when your mind doesn’t line up with what’s actually happening. For now, I’m just taking things one step at a time and trying to remind myself that I’m not in a race.
I guess I can talk about that… being overwhelmed. It’s like this constant pressure to get things done, but the pressure itself keeps me from actually doing them. I’m still working on the Christmas menu, though I think I finally have it figured out. Now I just need to make a shopping list, which isn’t too bad. I can probably do that after my therapy session.
But honestly, even therapy adds to the overwhelm. When I already feel like I’m behind, having to stop everything and shift into “therapy mode” makes it feel like even more pressure to get everything else done in time. I keep thinking I should use my planner today, but since I have therapy in half an hour, it feels like there’s no point because there’s just… no time. Everything feels rushed, even when it technically isn’t.
My therapist said that procrastinating at times can be a good thing. It’s not always laziness or avoidance; sometimes it’s your brain’s way of managing overload. The tricky part is telling the difference between:
* Protective procrastination (your system saying “slow down”), and
* Avoidant procrastination (putting things off because they feel scary or uncomfortable).
Not that I should be procrastinating, I definitely need to get things done. I’m going to post this and then finally get started on the Christmas shopping list. But that’s what we talked about in therapy today. For me, procrastinating can be a tricky, even dangerous, cycle. If I let myself put things off for too long, it becomes really hard to get back on task. It’s like the longer I wait, the heavier everything feels, and then the pressure builds until I don’t know where to start. I’m trying to recognize that pattern so I can catch it earlier and make things a little easier on myself.
I did manage to write in my planner today, right before my therapy appointment. I had my office door shut during the session, but the moment it ended, I was suddenly overwhelmed with anxiety about it being closed. So I opened it right away and stepped out to check on everything and the kids.
Alex had already left for work, and the girls were just doing their own thing. Karissa finished her semester yesterday, so she’s officially off for the holiday break now. She starts up again in January.
Anyway, I’m going off on a tangent. I’m going to post this and get some things done.
