talking

I’ve been gone from here for a while. My depression has been pretty high lately. The therapist says this would happen since I’m doing EDMR.. which is basically facing all your traumas head-on and learning about ways to cope with them. It’s kind of hard to explain. But bringing everything front and center makes for functioning a bit harder. One thing I have noticed is that I have become even quieter. I already don’t talk much. I already don’t give out my opinions and thoughts. Now it seems that I have a harder time getting my thoughts out to others. I wish I had an easier time talking to others. I hate that my mind goes blank whenever I’m around anyone and then there is this awkward silence since I can’t think of a damn thing to say. So you see, this makes writing harder to do. Even right now, I’m having trouble, even though I had thought about what I want to talk about. How do people talk about so many things? I even resorted to studying people to see if I can come up with some solution. As of right now, I have little.

Hopefully, my next post will be sooner than later. Oh, tomorrow I find out about my Celiac test. I really don’t believe I have Celiac. I do know I’m lactose intolerant and I know that practically everything out there has dairy in it.

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